Bienvenidos al Blog de Sitio Hispano

Los invito a que visiten nuestro Blog periódicamente. Aquí encontrarán informacion de gran interés, así como también una selección minuciosa de todos los artículos más relevantes, relacionados con la Astrología, el Tarot y las Ciencias Ocultas.


viernes, 6 de julio de 2012

TYPICAL TOPICS WITH HUMOR FOR EACH ZODIAC SIGN


This is a nice view of the signs, you may identify with them or identify other people in your environment.

ARIES  (21/3 - 20/4)
Aries is a sign of Fire: The spark. His more evident feature is the impetuosity and his motto is: "The life is brief, it is necessary to hurry up!

Aries never thinks what he is going to do, at least that anybody goes forward him. Because of it, when he walks, he does it with the head ahead of the trunk, and if someone, comes at the same time with him, he tries first to put his head out. Aries goes from the heart to the action without reflection: He throws himself from the springboard, and when he goes for the half, he discovers that in the swimming pool there is no water... and what ...? After the bump, he gets up with cynicism and dignity and exclaims: "Hey, you need to change the water, because it is becoming thick!". The word defeats does not exist in his vocabulary. It is the Bird Phoenix, it will always arise from his ashes.

Fearless and impulsive as a mountaineer goat, Aries wants to be always first in line at the supermarket, they are brave and are not afraid to confront the roaches and/or mice. They know the multiplication table up to 8 very well, but fail a little with the seven. Aries rarely gets a seat belt in cars and has a habit of whistling to the car ahead when getting the green light, they are the typical "people in a rush". They won't share the yolk of a fried egg, instead they will go to get the piece of bread in the egg of another person's bowl. They eat nails and play the lottery at number 6. (That is the multiplication table that best know). Players are at risk in the Parcheesi or Goose. Defenders of lawsuits poor, however, they do not support fail and when they make mistakes, they always blame others for their blunders. Never be late if you've agreed  with an Aries to watch a movie, they do not wait. They always play the role of the mother in playing football, they are the typical suckers. Ultimately, they're bossy.

TAURUS (21/4 - 21/5)
It is an Earth sign: La Casa. It is characterized by inexhaustible patience. His favorite phrase is: "I think therefore I stress" and its motto: "Life is short, enjoy it slowly so it will last longer."

When Taurus walks, does not raise a foot if the other is not on the ground. Because of it, more than walking, he makes history in every step. Aries throws himself of the springboard without looking, and Taurus, before getting up to the springboard, knows the name of the builder, the  used materials, the capacity of the water and the degrees of temperature, and later he throws himself. Aries acts in the life with determination, and Taurus with obstinacy. Aries wants that the whole world obeys him, and Taurus has an infinite patience in order that the others change opinion.

They are heavy and fussy, but what I will say is that he has a lot of patience and will. A little paranoid, they never feel entirely safe, even if they put two seat belts and drive a car with seven airbags. They have a good heart (or they like to believe) that's why they get surprised when the doctor diagnoses a  cardiopulmonary disease. They are affectionate and know how to make slaughtered beef eyes (watch out Libra, this makes them crazy). They like cars with stability control systems and power steering, the unsweetened yogurt, sofas with massage systems and different positions. A sofa in the middle of a park, but without flies. They do not like movies with ads, taking the coffee hastily, dyed hair and although they love the convenience of home, sometimes they think "it is a prison". That's their major contradiction.

GEMINI (22/5 - 21/6)
It is an Air sign: The burst. Its most obvious feature: Being two people in one body. His favorite phrase is: "Is not it all a lie?". They follow the motto: "Life is short, but as they do two things at once they will do very heavy."

It is an air blast with human body, to which, not only one does not see her to come, but one does not also see her to go. Everybody has  an internal self who handles the character, but Gemini has two selves, (sometimes he has more). One of them is sweet and an entertainer, and other one is critical and rebellious. Because of it Gemini does not have average term: Or he sees the virtues or he sees the faults, depends on the twin that speaks. If  the sweet twin speaks, it is possible that he says to you: " You are younger than ever", but if you get the other  plunder with the rebellious twin, it is possible that you hear: "I hope you end to the age that you represent".

They are courteous, kind, caring and generous, but they are a bit schizophrenic and liars but they prefer to be called: "versatile."Chameleon, contortionists of ideas, twisted, they are able to justify any outrage perpetrated. Verbositics, it seems like their batteries never end. They are the typical intellectual who know three or four quotes and are interspersed by time and convenience. He gets along well with himself (unless  they have discussed), they have different perspectives on things: Today and tomorrow, black white. They are cold and calculating, superficial, fickle and demanding, especially with others. You have two lives in one: The homespun and the other, the teaching.

CANCER (21/6 - 23/7)
It is a sign of Water: The Sea. Cancer is the sentimental insecurity in person, his favorite phrase is: "I feel, therefore I am" and its motto: "If life is short, at least someone has to love you"

To begin, they do not give you a bit of confidence, you've got to win based on love and tenderness and say a thousand times that you love him, because Cancer, more than a sentimental love, is a vampire and all the love seems little. You say: "I love you" and Cancer asks: "How much?".

They are: emotional, loving, protective, sympathetic, and stuffed, and who will believe in a stuffed "crab"?. Within the crustacean carapace  they say to have great imagination and can be very cautious, since, they can walk backward, to hide between the rocks and to change color with the way. But do not rely on them, when they are in a bad mood they become very heavy and have badly character. They can be calculating and untidy, though it is not the same thing, develop a  calculated disorder calculated in that they live very well, but the rest of the humanity  do not manage to deal. They change of state of mind every two or three seconds and turn out to be rather capable and they are always complaining about some imaginary pain. They like their  little house or the things of his house, like the hermits crabs.

LEO (24/7 - 23/8)
They love being the center of attention, and his favorite phrase is: "But I'm still the king" (as that Mexican song). His sentence could not be other than, "If life is short, let's take out the brightness".

Leo is the star that shines the brightest Star. They are easily distinguished, is that (or that) who stares at a light bulb and says: "You must see the light I'm giving to this bulb". Leo has a high opinion of himself. Somebody introduces a Leo to you  and you say: "Nice to meet you" and Leo responds: "I understand." They are easily discovered on the street because they do not walk, they model in a runway. And if the street is full of shops, Leo walks window shopping, not to see what's inside, but to be reflected in the glass, while he exclaims: "If I were not so expensive, I bought myself".

If you're Leo, what a  luck you had! because it is the best sign of the Zodiac: Loyal, Kind, generous, caring, loving like a bear, successful, creative, comprensive (and many other that end in "ive"), good person, a sex machine. Thus, it is not understood is how people are still seeking to contradict the "Leo"? They should rule the world, but they are too busy enjoying life. A Leo likes: Hide and Seek, marbles, dodgeball, the basin, takes the handkerchief and all those outdated games that no one can play anymore, although they have ever seen playing with the console. Also, they enjoy the holidays, luxury, night clubs, chocolate with almonds, rice pudding, beans with chorizo ​​and eggs poached in Bechamel sauce. The beautiful prayer book of his maiden aunt and the movie "The Lion King."

VIRGO (24/8 - 23/9)
It is an Earth sign: Harvesting. Its most obvious feature is the concern and his favorite phrase: "Let me correct." Lives by the motto: "Life is short and, moreover, nothing is in place."

Virgo is a magnifier with legs beginning to see where you end. It goes to your home, and the first thing they do is to swipe their finger over the TV to see if it is dusty. And as their humor is so crafty,  they might say, "Hey, this TV has character."Nothing escapes to Virgo! So its natural state is to be concerned. Virgo turns on himself by repeating: "I am worried, Iam woried" one says, "But if nothing happens" and Virgo responds: "That's what worries me".

They are very good as modest (they have no choice as they go behind a sign like Leo), smart (it is known that the smart Marta born under this sign), but timid, very perfectionist and meticulous, practical and strong workers  analytical skills, which does not serve anything all you have learned because it is too withdrawn to carry it out. What's wrong is that they are irritating, fussy, always worried: The time, the prices,  the retirement pension; he is picky and would like to gossip, but his shyness does not give to much and they have to settle for reading the gossip magazines in the salon. He is the typical vegetarian who cares and who think that eating a beef steak will take him to the grave. If you live with a Virgo let him make the list of provisions, the will do it full of fear and you will not forget anything, but do not let him go shopping, because that prices and expiration dates are tangled and he can screw it.

LIBRA (9/24 - 23/10)
Personified doubt, always think: "Sometimes yes, sometimes no." His motto is: "I have not the slightest doubt, life is short is not it?".

It's mentally quick, its only drawback is that while you have an idea, a question comes up: "Yes, yes, I have it clear, I'm getting married this year and if not this year, next or within three, nor why I have to rush. " The song by Julio Iglesias Libra is a treatise on the indecision: Neither I have you, or I forget, sometimes yes, sometimes no, not your gray cat, or your faithful dog. They are never completely safe and that makes Libra a professional almost argumentative, but do not ever recognize it, you have to set traps, as the bears. You say: "You like  to discuss a lot and Libra will say, "That's not true and I'll argue all you want."

What's good in a Libra? Well, all of them are good looking, thin  and they are very handsome, too,very polite, they always have the right word at the right time to please everyone and not commit to anything, they are like the reed that sways with the wind but without breaking enjoying the changing wind. "Yes, but no" is his motto. What to expect of a Libra? That at the time the wind shifts  they change the look and he was fine yesterday, and today, but tomorrow is wrong to be seen. They are very civilized (though I am not, I would say that civilized people say to be civilized is being hypocritical and opportunistic turncoat). They are charming, elegant, tasteful, friendly and peaceful, lovers of beauty and compromise with anything so as not to have problems.

SCORPIO (24/10 - 22/11)
The passion personified, love to say that you want. Thus they always say "Life is short, enjoy it by the piece."

Water is a sign: The mysterious lakes. They are easily recognized by their mysterious eyes. Scorpio does not look, he challenges you directly. Scorpio's eyes are as fine needles that go through to you when they impose their look. I suggest that when you see Scorpio in front, you say, "Hey, please, lowers long I do not see anything." If you do not, you will be hypnotized, he's very emotional, overly passionate. If he loves you, loves you more than others, and if he hates it will be the same. If you give Scorpio a book for his birthday,  he will give you an encyclopedia for yours. Loving is the same: You give a kiss and Scorpio makes love to you three times. Hating is not far, You break his car window and he will burn your house. Sure, that's what Scorpio said: "I didn't start it"

Scorpion is like a coffee of intense smell with aroma to emotional energy. It is deceptive, because though they seem quiet, they can extract his force or poison for good or for evil in a moment. They are observers and we should be  afraid when they act. His strong temperament can cause big benefits or damage. All this hides under an affable appearance, polite and talkative, so, be careful. Of all the signs of the Zodiac they are those that more possibilities have of being brilliant, but also with more possibilities of finishing madmen. They can manage to be tortured and kill themselves fixing his own sting to them. The good thing of the Scorpio is that they have a magnet that attracts the whole world, emotionally, determined, passionatly, powerfully, all movement.

SAGITTARIUS (23/11 - 21/12)
Always ahead of truth, they love to be sincere (and to tell you a hundred times a day they will be honest). Their motto: "Life is short, gallops and cuts the wind.

His vitality is stressful and their smile is always ahead of them. They have a gentle spirit and big feet that do not fit anywhere. They are recognized on the bus or subway: Is that person stepping more than ten minutes your foot and doesn't realize, because he looks at you and smiles saying: "Hello, hello". And of course, if someone is smiling at you that way, what are you gonna say?, Why are you stepping on me?, No way!, Because Sagittarius will feel it  much, he will raise his foot, and give you a kick in the shin.

Sagittarius is sincere, but not subtle, and if he persists in telling the truth, sooner or later he will say it. So I suggest that if someone of this sign approaches you and says, "I'll tell you the truth," you say, "What about me what I have done?". How to distinguish a Sagittarius? You'll know because then you will like him, unless you're a Cancer, the cancer does not get along well with almost none of the other signs of the Zodiac. They are friendly, honest and sincere. They like to pose as intellectuals, but as they do with good humor, they are not pedantic. The bad about this sign? they perform badly being evil bad guys, they do not know and they are so optimistic that sometimes they pass from thread and border on exaggeration. They are also somewhat irresponsible, careless and fidgety, more accurately, the typical lizard tail.

CAPRICORN (22/12 - 20/1)
It is an Earth sign: The mountain. He believes he is  essential. "What would you be without me?". Their motto: "Life is short, thank goodness it's steep."

It is a goat and the goat always strip the bush. If you see a Capricorn that jumping from the tenth floor, follow him!, Which is up. More than in luck, they believe in the effort, and that makes a father a little bit heavy. Capricorn, for being happy, they need to control everything, and if not, he becomes like a marmoset. Like that Capricorn priest who was dying and in agony he told the nuns who were taking care of him, "Oh, what will  you become when I die, who will look after you, who will guide your steps?" And one of the nuns, I think she was Leo exclaimed, "Do not worry Your Holiness, that Jesuschrist also died and look at us, we have gone forward."

Capricorn is another balanced sign of the Zodiac  (if there is way to balance a sign that it is both goat and the other fish). On one side, with ambition and discipline of the goat of the legion, on the other, pessimistic and almost anything evil as a Merluzo fish. It has the typical sense of humor something "little dark" and he is very quiet. He does not like to do favors, so you better not to ask him,  he will thank you. They like high reliability products and free repair service for three years.

AQUARIUS (21/1 - 19/2)
It is an Air sign: The whirlwind of colors. They love to surprise others and his favorite phrase is: "What's today's date? ¿Is it today or tomorrow? ".Their motto: "Life is short, the short is life, life is a short life. By the way, what do you short, life? ".

He is a future person living in the present as if it we were already past. So they greet as if we were prehistoric prototypes: "Hi, Jurassic, how do you carry your early life?". They love to surprise with the words: "Last night you were missed and now that you are here, I miss you more." Do not get confused, you're saying that you want, but they enjoy being original. They have an idea for a second, the only drawback is that he gets an idea, and when he is going to do it, it comes up with another and another and another idea. As the Aquarian says: "I have too much to do  this morning that not only I have not done them, but I'm also exhausted". If his b  body is not stimulated, Aquarius is going to move less than a tennis umpire.

What is an Aquarius apart from a place where the fish is enclosed for spin ning and dizzying just for our viewing pleasure? So they are those who believe that because they were born from January 20 to February 18, according to the Gregorian calendar, they have a strong personality and personal characteristics and their corresponding celestial designs. They come in two types: one shy, sensitive, patient and other exuberant, lively and frivolous aspect, that which of the two Aquarius is where you belong?, That will have to be discovered by tou. But do not worry, both are honest, sincere and with a high sense of his convictions and moral force, and what is reasonable and what is not, so if you're still reading this is ... perhaps you're not a true Aquarius.

PISCES (20/2 - 20/3)
It is a sign of Water: The river. They love that about dreaming and always will have something to tell you. His favorite phrase is: "Guess what happened to me?". According to them: "Life is short, but if you do not dream it becomes  very long"

What eats a Pisces? Pisces is a sign that looks a little goofy but it is said that they are imaginative, sensitive, quiet and friendly and have a tendency to think of others, which is a rare feature. They do not like getting thrown in the Aquarium and less with Crabs (cancer) and do not respect social conventions.What is good about the Pisces? Well, they are sensitive, imaginative and helpful. If you ever see a person across the street helping a little old lady or a blind, you can be sure it is a Pisces.He Is the most sensitive sign in the Zodiac and he las loosen the spring of laughter and tears, so that he passes from one to another with a unique facility. Pisces cries because her aunt has died, and soon he laughs because the poor old lady was too fat to fit in the coffin. Pisces, more than living, exists!. That one Pisces excited watching a sunset, and another approached him and sayd, "What are you doing?" and  Pisces says, while watching the sunset, "Nothing" and says the other: "Are not you bored?" and Pisces ends: "If you do not interrupt me, not."

I hope your sign has fit you. They are funny descriptions whose only purpose is to make out a smile that's always good, true qualities of the people according to their sign, and that all astrologers know, but until now none had dared to say. Do not forget to visit our web site Sitio Hispano de Astrología .

Namaste. 

LUNA NUEVA

No hay comentarios: